Baby Hayden

We had Hayden's photos taken the other day. And they are SO cute! Had to share a few!

Target Parking Lot Fail.

This week has FLOWN by!  For real.  I am officially the Mother of 2 and this week has had it's ups and downs.  Leeland and I have both had colds this week, and Daniel has been busy studying for a big exam he had today.  Hayden has jaundice and our week has been filled with doctor's appointments and home visits by nurses to check in on him.  I'm not entirely sure what I expected as far as becoming a Mother of 2.... I know I didn't expect it to be easy, but I don't think I calculated added stresses of sickness to the mix. 

Anywho, today we got out of the house for something OTHER than a doctor's appointment.  We needed some baby supplies and a few other random items, and I had a coupon to Target for $10 off so that's where we headed. (Not to mention, I really just needed to be out of the house.) Leeland was in the cart and Hayden was wrapped snug in the sleepy wrap I'm borrowing from a friend.  Hayden slept the whole time in the wrap and Leeland chatted my ear off about everything he saw in the store and said hello to all who passed us by.

Then we get out to the parking lot.  The weather here in NC has been nuts!  We got 3 inches of snow this past Sunday and then yesterday and today it has been in the 70's! Weird.  But also there is a thunderstorm rolling in supposedly for later this evening, so today it is WINDY-- I mean, really windy.  So we get out to the car and I get Hayden out of the wrap and buckled into his car seat.  Then I'm loading our bags into the car and I drop the bottled water that I bought.  If you have ever breastfed before, you know all about the incredible thirst you get when you're nursing.  I mean, I could drink a lake and still be parched. For real!  So when my water bottle went rolling under the car, no matter how far it rolled, I was going after it.  I needed it that bad!  So I load the rest of the bags and lay down on the nasty parking lot and start looking under the car.  Thankfully, it stayed under my car and didn't continue through the parking lot to somewhere else.  I finally reach the water and am feeling pretty good about myself....  Then I stand up to see that the wind is blowing Leeland away in the cart across the parking lot.  So I sprint across the aisle and capture the cart with Leeland and start to get him in the car.....

Then I hear a car start-- there was a lady sitting in her car next to mine, waiting to pull out this entire time.  I was totally holding her up with my doors open and with the cart and with the rolling around the ground to retrieve my water.  So embarrassing!

Well, now that I got that "make a fool out of yourself as a 1st time mom of 2" experience out of the way, we can all move forward and I continue to learn how to juggle these boys.

Hayden's birth story.

I'm so happy to announce that our 2nd baby boy was born this past Sunday, February 19, 2012.  And I'm even more excited to share the story of his birth because it was just THAT awesome.  For real, it still gets my adrenaline pumping.  Last month I penned down Leeland's birth story for the first time-- if you've read his story, this one is going to be a little bit different. 

The goal of Hayden's birth was to have a natural (vaginal) non-medicated birth assisted by a midwife.  This post is by no means meant to bash doctors, epidurals or inductions because if you have read Leeland's birth story, you know I've been there. But this post is meant to let you know that there are other ways-- natural childbirth is possible, is real, and is WAY more rewarding and fun. 

Going into this past week, I was so incredibly excited and anxious about Hayden's upcoming arrival.  Those who know me personally know that I am absolutely terrible with surprises so I was driving myself a little mad wondering when he would be here.  You also may remember my 37 weeks post where I talked about things coming together for our water birth.  I had 2 lovely doulas ready for me to be in labor, the pool and all it entails, and my bags were packed.  Just anxiously awaiting the day that I could meet our boy. 

On two separate occasions this past week, I had what we'll call "false starts."  And I'm not talking Braxton Hicks contractions-- I have been having Braxton Hicks contractions for a long while now.  I'm talking false starts in a sense that I had a few real contractions, mild in pain, and then they would stop.  It happened twice and it really irked me.  They started and I got myself all worked up and excited and they stopped.  I say all this to let you know that this past Sunday when the contractions started once again, I honestly was still upset about them stopping before and shrugged them off as another false start. 

I woke up with the contractions at first around 630am.  I continued to lay in bed and breath through them thinking in my mind that they would stop and I'd be back to sleep in no time.  Daniel woke up soon after that and was getting ready to go to the gym like he does every Sunday morning.  I told him that I had been having contractions, he asked how many and I replied 7.  He asked me how far apart they were and I told him I had no clue.  He started to waver about going to the gym.  My prior "false starts" were only about 4 or 5 contractions so to him, 7 was a lot.  I told him not to worry about it and go to the gym.  I insisted that this may not be real labor and that he was getting on my nerves asking too many questions. (Sorry honey, you can't blame me for things I say when I'm in labor.)  After Daniel left for the gym, I was still having contractions and was officially awake-- there was no going back to bed.  I decided to hop in the shower to distract myself.  I remember standing in the shower and feeling Hayden's little tush sticking out on my right side.  I rubbed my side and asked him aloud if today was really going to be the day.  It was a sweet little moment, and now I know that it was a moment that was shared between us on the last day he was in the womb. 

Once I got out of the shower, I continued to assume the contractions would cease soon and just decided I needed to distract myself and work through them.  I folded and put away laundry, I picked up around the house, cleaned the kitchen and even made french toast.  Finally at around 930am, it started to hit me that this could be the real thing.  I wanted to call my doula, but then I was kind of embarassed-- I knew she would ask me how far apart the contractions were and I literally had no idea because I had been playing mind games with myself all morning.  I called Daniel at the gym and told him he might want to come on home and that I needed his help to time the contractions.  He got home and was 1st amazed that I was standing in the kitchen cooking breakfast while in labor, and he was a little panicked and wanted to rush out to the hospital.  I told him we needed to time the contractions before we started to do anything.... and up until this point, Leeland was still asleep so we needed to think about where he was going. 

Daniel started to time the contractions which was very confusing to both of us.  I was having 1 hard contraction and then I would have 1 or 2 smaller ones and then another hard-- it was a pretty consistent pattern.  We assumed we needed to time them all which would've put them about 2 minutes apart, which made Daniel really want to go to the hospital.  I still wasn't convinced or ready and decided I wanted to talk to my doula Jessica first and see if she thought that I was ready.  I called her on the phone and told her very vaguely about the contractions-- Daniel and I had no clue what we were doing so I feel like she didn't have a lot of information to go on. She called my other doula Bridget who happened to be close by in the area.  So Bridget came by to check things out and see how I was doing.  She asked about the timing of my contractions and since I really had no idea we started timing them.  This time around we only timed the harder ones and skipped the milder ones in between.  The harder ones were consistently 5 minutes apart. 

She suggested I contact our midwife/OB office and let them know that my contractions were about 5 minutes apart and lasting about 20-30 seconds.  I called and the midwife on duty, Virginia, she said that it was up to how I was feeling about coming in.  She said that 5 minutes was really good and since this was my 2nd child, she felt that I would be able to discern when I was ready.  They were gaining intensity and I knew that if it were up to Daniel we would've been to the hospital a few hours prior, so I told Bridget, let's give it 20 minutes and head out.  She called Jessica who happened to be about 20-30 minutes away so we decided we would meet her there at the hospital.

During all of this my in-laws had dropped by on there way out of state, and some friends of ours came by to watch Leeland.  Daniel installed Leeland's car seat into their car, and I packed Leeland a "just in case" overnight bag, and packed the last of my toiletries into my suit case for the hospital.  We headed out-- the dreaded car ride.  Up to this point, I had taken all of my contractions standing, walking and swaying.  Sitting hurt and it was hard to cope sitting.  In the 11 minute car ride to the hospital, I had 4 hard contractions-- I had white knuckles from gripping the car door handle and I refused to wear a seat belt.  Once we got out of the car, I had to fill out some admissions paper work and due to the car ride, I had sort of lost my rythym working through each contraction.  Once I felt like I had caught back up, they whisked me away to be checked for admission.  Only 1 person could come back with me at this point so Daniel did.  Standard hospital procedure was to check for dilation, contractions, and listen to the baby's heart-- standard procedure to verify labor and then have the doctor or midwife decide whether or not to admit you.  All well and good standard procedure, except when it is very clear that a woman is in labor.  I was annoyed, I didn't want to sit, I didn't want to lay, I wanted to stand and sway and lean over the bed.  The poor nurse that was assigned to me for this part was very very kind and didn't seem bothered by me not being very compliant.  She set out to find Hayden's heart beat which took FOREVER, mostly because of the position I was standing in made it hard for her.  Then she had to unfortunately have me lay down to check for dilation for a minute-- she was very cooperative with me and waited for when I was ready and she checked so quickly that I'm not entirely sure she got a good estimate and she definitely didn't know how effaced I was.  She said I was 5cm and insisted I sit in a wheel chair to be taken to a delivery room.  I wanted to walk, but she said the wheel chair would be faster and she had noted my rythym and pattern of dealing with the contractions and mentioned that in the hall there was nothing to lean over to cope.  Just before I sat down in the wheel chair I felt a couple gushes of fluid.  I honestly thought I might had peed myself-- we now of course know that my water had broken.

She was right about the wheel chair being fast.  We barreled down the hallway and collected Jessica and Bridget along the way.  We got into the room and everyone immediately started setting up our inflatable birth pool-- that's all that was on my mind as the contractions were getting more intense was how great the water was going to feel.  I had a nurse on my left asking me all kinds of preliminary questions about allergies and such and I felt a nurse around my waist trying again to find Hayden's heart beat.  I was standing hunched over the bed, and when contractions came, I would lean over the bed and sway a little.  They were harder and faster, I was sweating more than I ever had in my entire life.  Jessica was wiping my face with a cool cloth and both she and Bridget were blurting out little praises and encouragement.  I remember saying at least once, "I can't" and they assured me "Yes I can."  Someone got me a birthing ball and offered it to me to sit on.  All I could remember was the car ride and how sitting hurt so at first I was resistant, but then I sat down and it actually felt really nice.  I was still hunched over the bed at this point. 

It felt like literally just a moment later I felt a huge amount of pressure and knew that Hayden was coming. I blurted out, "He's coming!" and though I wasn't looking and had no idea what anyone was doing at this point behind me, there was a panic.  Daniel says that a nurse stuck her hand behind me at that point, and said, "Yes, the baby's coming!" and then everyone began to run.  I was assisted up onto the bed for fear that the baby was going to fall to the floor.  I wasn't trying to push but totally felt my body pushing him out on it's own as I was there on all 4's on the bed.  I was told that there was a flood of nurses at this point in the room trying to get the delivery table set up and everything prepared because he was coming so fast.  My midwife told me that she nearly took out 2 people running down the hallway.  All I heard was a voice say, "reach down and touch your baby" and a few moments later, "he's here, you can hold your baby!"  I think I may have only physically put in 2 pushes because my body was doing much of the work.  I rolled over onto my back and they placed Hayden on my tummy-- his cord was too short to go any higher. 

I was in shock and in awe at what had just happened.  We had literally just pulled up at the doors of the hospital an hour ago.... we had only been in the actual delivery room like 20 minutes.  The pool only had a couple inches of water in it.  It was SO crazy.  I was on a high-- Hayden was finally here, and what an incredible story of his labor.  I DID IT!  I had my baby completely naturally! 

What an incredible, incredible experience!!

Hayden was here!  He picked his own birthday, there was no induction, no needles, not even a standard IV because there was no time.  I surprisingly felt really good.  No tearing, and really only just a little swelling which is to be expected.  

Hayden latched to the breast right away and breast feeding has been pretty awesome and easy in the few days since which is not something that could've been said of my 1st son.

In a lot of ways, I'm still on a high and an adrenaline rush.

It was simply awesome!

Hayden Daniel Kroh

2-19-12    12:50PM

7 pounds, 9 ounces

19 inches long

And a very special thank you to my village who made this possible! 

Birthday Ulta Haul

So I mentioned in a previous post that I spoiled myself at Ulta for my birthday and I have been meaning to write about and review the goods I got.  My parents and Daniel's parents had given me a little cash for my birthday and I had been wanting to try some new skincare and make-up products and was looking forward to splurging.  The downside is that after I made the purchases, a bit of Mommy guilt started to settle in.... Just thinking about what I could've bought for the boys or for the house with that money.  Daniel continued to insist that I keep what I purchased and that it was important for me as a Mom to feel good about myself and to get something for myself sometimes.  Why does it have to be so hard? 

Anyways, without further ado, the 1st thing that I got was a Philosophy Skin Care Trial kit.  It came with face wash, a retinol night cream, and a moisturizer.  I have pretty much always struggled with break outs since I was about 12 years old, so I was looking for something to help out with that.  Not to mention, pregnancy makes me break out like a mad woman-- far worse than the puberty break outs.  I was really excited to try this product because it had RAVE reviews online and I have heard many friends talk about how awesome Philosophy is.  I couldn't try the night cream because I am pregnant, but I began using the face wash and moisturizer immediately twice a day.  The 1st week went great-- I noticed my skin clearing up, and it felt so soft.  The 2nd week, things went down hill.  My face started itching like CRAZY all day long.  At first I thought that maybe the facial cleanser was drying my skin out and maybe I wasn't moisturizing enough-- the kit was pretty pricey so I was being very frugal with product trying to make it last.  So I started doubling the amount of moisturizer I was using.  The itching didn't stop.  I couldn't take it.  I had to return the product. When you spend that kind of money on something, it really needs to make you happy and I just wasn't.  Maybe my skin is overly sensitive?

 I took the product back and got a face wash and moisturizer that was WAY cheaper and felt a lot better about it.  It's from "Formula 10.0.6".  I had never heard of the brand but Ulta was doing a buy 1 get 1 free sale on it.  I got the "Best Face Forward" face wash and "Seriously Shine Free" moisturizer.  They are AWESOME!  And they were not even 1/4 of the cost of the Philosophy stuff. 

The other purchase I made originally was for some more make-up.  I wrote a post a LONG time ago about my love of bare minerals and I still really like bare minerals but I was just in need of a change.  I have been swirling, tapping and buffing for a long time and I'm just one of those girls that tends to get a little bored with things after a while.  So after reading reviews and watching You Tube videos of people putting on make-up (because I'm nerdy like that and because I don't spend that kind of money without doing a little research first) I decided to go with make-up by Smashbox.  They have a trial kit called the complexion perfection kit that comes with a primer, foundation, concealer and powder.  It sounded like a great place to start and I really and truly could not be more pleased with it.  It has REALLY awesome coverage, and I feel like it makes my skin look pretty close to flawless when it is definitely FAR from it. 

All in all, I am extremely pleased with my birthday gifts that I picked out, and definitely feel like my new skincare regimen gives me a little more confidence and a little more pep in my step and there is nothing wrong with that.  It's easy to lose yourself when you become a Mom, so it feels really good to take care of myself, and splurge a little on me once in a while... even if that means forcing myself.... and even if that means I have to get over a little guilt in the end.

Preparing for Hayden

I was beginning to wonder when the infamous "nesting" instinct would kick in. I've felt pretty sloth-like for the past month or so.  Kicking back and napping when I can squeeze one in.  I mean, absolutely no motivation to do anything.  The past 2 days though, I have really been checking things off of my list.  I'm not entirely sure that it's nesting, or if it's just trying to be productive to pass the time while Daniel is out of town-- either way, it's exciting to have a little extra energy, to feel accomplished, and to be a productive member of society. So without further ado, here are the things that I have accomplished:

• My car was inspected... and passed.
• Also, my leaky flat tire that I have continued to put air in about twice a week for the past month has now been patched.
• Made a few exchanges at Babies R Us, and picked up the last few things I feel like we need for Hayden.
• Put together our fancy new stroller-- our "sit-n-stand tandem stroller".  Exciting!
• Put away all of said baby items that were purchased and items from the baby shower which pretty much meant re-organizing Leeland's room entirely.  It took an hour and a half to find the proper homes for each thing, trying to make the room make sense and make the necessary items easily accessible. We live in a 2 bedroom apartment currently so the boys will technically be sharing a room.... or at least their stuff will share a room for now because Hayden will be in the pack and play in our room for a few months. 
• Washed all of the laundry in the house, including all of Hayden's new "itty bittys".  
• Washed, organized and put away all of Leeland's cloth diapers.  (Another area that needed re-organizing was the changing table to make room for Hayden's cloth diapers.)
• Packed the bag for the hospital! You know, THE bag.  Like my stuff, Hayden's things, change of clothes for Daniel.  All that's left is the last minute toiletries that I'm currently using.  
• Wrote out thank-you notes from the baby shower.  We were so incredibly blessed and I truly don't feel like a little note or just saying thank you is enough, but hopefully they appreciate it. 
• Visited the local Baby Boutique today and got the last of the diapers necessary for Hayden.  
• Washed and prepped all of Hayden's diapers.  Cloth diapers have to be washed 3-5 times before initial use-- it's cleaning the natural oils out of them, and fluffing them up, somehow making them absorbent.  
• Vacuumed out my car.
• Installed Hayden's car seat in the car.  Holy wow!  That's a wake up call, and quite a visual, seeing TWO car seats in my tiny car!
• Cleaned out the trunk.

All very exciting things!  Happy to have checked all of these things off of my list-- I can officially say that I am ready for this baby.  I'm not entirely sure why it took so much more time this pregnancy to get to that feeling of "ready," but I'm happy that we've gotten there.  I've moved away from that point of anxiety and fear of having two children.  There's peace now.  Now it's just waiting for him to decide when he wants to come.