Let's Be Real & An Update

Daniel brought it to my attention within the past couple weeks that I hadn't blogged in a while.  My reply was first just that I didn't have anything to say, but let's be real-- more than a month has passed and LOTS of things have happened.  The real answer is that I didn't have anything that I wanted to say.  To be honest, this month has been full of ups and DOWNS.  I went through a period of depression, we had sad news and exciting news, and the boys have grown up a ton. 
The beauty of the internet is that you get to choose what you put out there to people-- so unless you follow my Facebook and read a few of my super "Debbie Downer" posts, you may not have known that I was depressed.  Honestly it was bound to happen, I tried my best to avoid it, prepared for it knowing it would be a struggle since it was after Leeland was born, but sometimes life just gets a person.  Life can be stressful-- and I let it stress me out. 
One of the things that I have come to appreciate about blogging is the few "real" women out there blogging.  I used to follow LOADS of blogs and keep up with reading each and every one, but lately I gravitate to those few ladies who are honest and truthful.  They tell it like it is-- they aren't happy, happy all the time.  I want to be one of them.  I want to be real. 
So there you have it folks-- typed out for all to read.  Post Partum Depression is no joke.  It's very real and it's a daily struggle for many. 

So what has happened with us in the past month:

-Hayden turned 3 months old and even tried some rice cereal for the 1st time.
-We gave potty training an attempt with Leeland, wasn't a total fail but we also haven't hit the point where it "clicked" yet so we're back in diapers.  We plan to give it a try again soon.
-I got a new bathing suit which I am in LOVE with!  It's super cute, and honestly pretty sexy to be a one piece.  And it is a "control top" or spanx like suit, so it sucks in the post baby belly.  Never, ever pictured myself at age 25 being stoked about spanx like things, but I also never pictured myself at 25 with two kids. Mmkay!
-I started a new Bible Study at church on Wednesday mornings.  We're doing the Beth Moore "James" study, they offer child care, so I'm not only enjoying the study but also the adult time.
-MOPS (Mothers of PreSchoolers) came to an end for the year.  I have already registered for next year, and even sort of volunteered myself to be a table leader.... what was I thinking? Haha.
-I started running AGAIN, after being interrupted, and unmotivated from the depression.  Kind of amazing how running exerts lots of energy, and yet the days that I run, I have more energy.  Doesn't make sense, but exercise is good for my body and my mind.  Plus it's "Mommy time."
-We got a pre-approval from a bank to try to buy a house.  Still sort of a long shot and our budget is pretty small, so we're trying to keep from getting too excited but it is kind of fun to think about being out of the apartment and into our own home. 
-Leeland became that kid that knows all of the characters on Nick Jr.  I tried to avoid it, but when you have a newborn and you're in a funk yourself, TV becomes your friend.  He never used to sit and watch like this but now he's really into it.  Trying to limit it daily, but depending on the weather, outdoors isn't always an option. 
-I celebrated another Mother's Day.  Daniel had to work all day, so it was truly a day spent with my boys.  Love them!

I'm sure there is more that isn't coming to mind at this moment.  But I'm back to blogging, and more inspired.  The Lord has taught me SO much in this past month that I wouldn't even know where to begin-- so much about being appreciative, about perspective, and I have truly felt his hand taking care of me and literally lifting me out of the funk. 

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace.

In this world you will have trouble.  But take heart! I have 

overcome the world. " --John 16:33

Strawberry picking.

This morning we headed out with my dear friend Anna to pick some strawberries.  I was extremely excited because this is Leeland's 1st time picking. So exciting to see his reaction to new things, and seeing him get into so many more activities as he is growing up. And after I got home this afternoon and started thinking on it a bit, I'm pretty certain that this was my 1st time actually picking strawberries too. At least I can't recall ever picking before. Sad, huh?
Anywho, other than the fact that it rained yesterday and we got a little muddy, it was pretty perfect.  Leeland got into it, and had fun picking the berries off the vine and collecting them in his little red basket.  And of course the part he really liked was the fruit of his labor, literally. We were trying to take a few photos at the end, and he was munching away at the sweet berries before we headed out.  Of course picking the biggest berries in the box to eat. He's a smart one that kid!

 Now it's on to cleaning, chopping and storing all of these delicious strawberries! I do believe we have some tasty smoothies, and strawberry bread in our future! :)

Leeland is 2!

Over the weekend Leeland turned 2! Holy wow! We celebrated by going to the zoo on Friday (Leeland's 1st time going), and we had a small family birthday party on Saturday. His birthday party was "choo choo" train themed in orange and blue matching this birthday invitation we ordered from Etsy.  Leeland loves all things transportation-- cars, trains, airplanes, helicopters so he really really enjoyed it.  The menu was very NC, we had BBQ, slaw, baked beans, chips, fresh fruit, pasta salad, and of course I made cupcakes for my boy.  Along with some choo choo candy pops that I made with blue and orange candy melts and a candy mold I ordered from Amazon. Here are some photos from the party--

I think he had a blast! He was showered with gifts, enjoyed some really yummy BBQ, and of course lots of sweets with cupcakes and ice cream cones and candy.  You only turn 2 once!

Also, today he had his 2 year check-up at the doctor and he is a healthy growing little boy!  He weighs 26 pounds which puts him in the 25th percentile (up from the 15th percentile at his last appointment), and he is exactly 3 feet tall in the 85th percentile for height. 

Who knew?

Who knew that such a tiny person could take up so much space? We live in a quaint 2 bedroom, 2 bath apartment.  We have about 900 square feet to ourselves and I'm pretty sure that calculation includes our balcony and closet spaces... the living space is much less.  We moved to this apartment when we were pregnant with Leeland in the Fall of 2009 from our 1 bedroom, 1 bath apartment.  Last year when we found out that we were expecting Hayden, and our lease was up in October, we couldn't afford to even look at upgrading to a 3 bedroom.  Apartment rates are through the roof currently-- I'm told that it's due to the high demand from foreclosures.  Not to mention, with Daniel's schooling and a toddler and me being pregnant, we weren't exactly sure we had the time or energy to even try to move. 

So we were expecting #2, no big deal! And another boy, even better, they could share a room.  We set up the Pack & Play in our room knowing that he would be in our room for at least a few months, and then we would transition him to share a room with Leeland.  Leeland would transition to a "big boy" (twin) bed and Hayden would get the crib.  I cleaned out and organized Leeland's current dresser and closet to contain Hayden's clothes as well, it was going to work out perfect! .... Right?

The walls are closing in around me!!! Literally.  Now that Hayden is here, we pulled the baby swing out of storage, we have a car seat coming in and out of the house, a baby bath tub taking up the counter in the 2nd bathroom, a bouncy chair, we moved the glider from Leeland's room into the living room...... and the list goes on. Oh and please let me add, the Pack & Play in our room next to the bed-- we already had furniture on all four walls, with the Pack & Play added to the mix, I literally have 8 inches to squeeze through to get to our bathroom. Ugh!!

I feel terrible and I feel SO incredibly selfish complaining about our space.  There are so many people who are making do with much smaller spaces and larger families.... and there are so many people that don't even have a space.  But we are out growing this place.  The walls are closing in around us.  Leeland doesn't have room to run and play, I don't have room to breathe.... it just doesn't make any sense that this tiny tiny person could push us out this place.

Happy Easter!

He is risen!

He is risen indeed!

Happy Easter dear friends from our family to yours!