Hayden's birth story.

I'm so happy to announce that our 2nd baby boy was born this past Sunday, February 19, 2012.  And I'm even more excited to share the story of his birth because it was just THAT awesome.  For real, it still gets my adrenaline pumping.  Last month I penned down Leeland's birth story for the first time-- if you've read his story, this one is going to be a little bit different. 

The goal of Hayden's birth was to have a natural (vaginal) non-medicated birth assisted by a midwife.  This post is by no means meant to bash doctors, epidurals or inductions because if you have read Leeland's birth story, you know I've been there. But this post is meant to let you know that there are other ways-- natural childbirth is possible, is real, and is WAY more rewarding and fun. 

Going into this past week, I was so incredibly excited and anxious about Hayden's upcoming arrival.  Those who know me personally know that I am absolutely terrible with surprises so I was driving myself a little mad wondering when he would be here.  You also may remember my 37 weeks post where I talked about things coming together for our water birth.  I had 2 lovely doulas ready for me to be in labor, the pool and all it entails, and my bags were packed.  Just anxiously awaiting the day that I could meet our boy. 

On two separate occasions this past week, I had what we'll call "false starts."  And I'm not talking Braxton Hicks contractions-- I have been having Braxton Hicks contractions for a long while now.  I'm talking false starts in a sense that I had a few real contractions, mild in pain, and then they would stop.  It happened twice and it really irked me.  They started and I got myself all worked up and excited and they stopped.  I say all this to let you know that this past Sunday when the contractions started once again, I honestly was still upset about them stopping before and shrugged them off as another false start. 

I woke up with the contractions at first around 630am.  I continued to lay in bed and breath through them thinking in my mind that they would stop and I'd be back to sleep in no time.  Daniel woke up soon after that and was getting ready to go to the gym like he does every Sunday morning.  I told him that I had been having contractions, he asked how many and I replied 7.  He asked me how far apart they were and I told him I had no clue.  He started to waver about going to the gym.  My prior "false starts" were only about 4 or 5 contractions so to him, 7 was a lot.  I told him not to worry about it and go to the gym.  I insisted that this may not be real labor and that he was getting on my nerves asking too many questions. (Sorry honey, you can't blame me for things I say when I'm in labor.)  After Daniel left for the gym, I was still having contractions and was officially awake-- there was no going back to bed.  I decided to hop in the shower to distract myself.  I remember standing in the shower and feeling Hayden's little tush sticking out on my right side.  I rubbed my side and asked him aloud if today was really going to be the day.  It was a sweet little moment, and now I know that it was a moment that was shared between us on the last day he was in the womb. 

Once I got out of the shower, I continued to assume the contractions would cease soon and just decided I needed to distract myself and work through them.  I folded and put away laundry, I picked up around the house, cleaned the kitchen and even made french toast.  Finally at around 930am, it started to hit me that this could be the real thing.  I wanted to call my doula, but then I was kind of embarassed-- I knew she would ask me how far apart the contractions were and I literally had no idea because I had been playing mind games with myself all morning.  I called Daniel at the gym and told him he might want to come on home and that I needed his help to time the contractions.  He got home and was 1st amazed that I was standing in the kitchen cooking breakfast while in labor, and he was a little panicked and wanted to rush out to the hospital.  I told him we needed to time the contractions before we started to do anything.... and up until this point, Leeland was still asleep so we needed to think about where he was going. 

Daniel started to time the contractions which was very confusing to both of us.  I was having 1 hard contraction and then I would have 1 or 2 smaller ones and then another hard-- it was a pretty consistent pattern.  We assumed we needed to time them all which would've put them about 2 minutes apart, which made Daniel really want to go to the hospital.  I still wasn't convinced or ready and decided I wanted to talk to my doula Jessica first and see if she thought that I was ready.  I called her on the phone and told her very vaguely about the contractions-- Daniel and I had no clue what we were doing so I feel like she didn't have a lot of information to go on. She called my other doula Bridget who happened to be close by in the area.  So Bridget came by to check things out and see how I was doing.  She asked about the timing of my contractions and since I really had no idea we started timing them.  This time around we only timed the harder ones and skipped the milder ones in between.  The harder ones were consistently 5 minutes apart. 

She suggested I contact our midwife/OB office and let them know that my contractions were about 5 minutes apart and lasting about 20-30 seconds.  I called and the midwife on duty, Virginia, she said that it was up to how I was feeling about coming in.  She said that 5 minutes was really good and since this was my 2nd child, she felt that I would be able to discern when I was ready.  They were gaining intensity and I knew that if it were up to Daniel we would've been to the hospital a few hours prior, so I told Bridget, let's give it 20 minutes and head out.  She called Jessica who happened to be about 20-30 minutes away so we decided we would meet her there at the hospital.

During all of this my in-laws had dropped by on there way out of state, and some friends of ours came by to watch Leeland.  Daniel installed Leeland's car seat into their car, and I packed Leeland a "just in case" overnight bag, and packed the last of my toiletries into my suit case for the hospital.  We headed out-- the dreaded car ride.  Up to this point, I had taken all of my contractions standing, walking and swaying.  Sitting hurt and it was hard to cope sitting.  In the 11 minute car ride to the hospital, I had 4 hard contractions-- I had white knuckles from gripping the car door handle and I refused to wear a seat belt.  Once we got out of the car, I had to fill out some admissions paper work and due to the car ride, I had sort of lost my rythym working through each contraction.  Once I felt like I had caught back up, they whisked me away to be checked for admission.  Only 1 person could come back with me at this point so Daniel did.  Standard hospital procedure was to check for dilation, contractions, and listen to the baby's heart-- standard procedure to verify labor and then have the doctor or midwife decide whether or not to admit you.  All well and good standard procedure, except when it is very clear that a woman is in labor.  I was annoyed, I didn't want to sit, I didn't want to lay, I wanted to stand and sway and lean over the bed.  The poor nurse that was assigned to me for this part was very very kind and didn't seem bothered by me not being very compliant.  She set out to find Hayden's heart beat which took FOREVER, mostly because of the position I was standing in made it hard for her.  Then she had to unfortunately have me lay down to check for dilation for a minute-- she was very cooperative with me and waited for when I was ready and she checked so quickly that I'm not entirely sure she got a good estimate and she definitely didn't know how effaced I was.  She said I was 5cm and insisted I sit in a wheel chair to be taken to a delivery room.  I wanted to walk, but she said the wheel chair would be faster and she had noted my rythym and pattern of dealing with the contractions and mentioned that in the hall there was nothing to lean over to cope.  Just before I sat down in the wheel chair I felt a couple gushes of fluid.  I honestly thought I might had peed myself-- we now of course know that my water had broken.

She was right about the wheel chair being fast.  We barreled down the hallway and collected Jessica and Bridget along the way.  We got into the room and everyone immediately started setting up our inflatable birth pool-- that's all that was on my mind as the contractions were getting more intense was how great the water was going to feel.  I had a nurse on my left asking me all kinds of preliminary questions about allergies and such and I felt a nurse around my waist trying again to find Hayden's heart beat.  I was standing hunched over the bed, and when contractions came, I would lean over the bed and sway a little.  They were harder and faster, I was sweating more than I ever had in my entire life.  Jessica was wiping my face with a cool cloth and both she and Bridget were blurting out little praises and encouragement.  I remember saying at least once, "I can't" and they assured me "Yes I can."  Someone got me a birthing ball and offered it to me to sit on.  All I could remember was the car ride and how sitting hurt so at first I was resistant, but then I sat down and it actually felt really nice.  I was still hunched over the bed at this point. 

It felt like literally just a moment later I felt a huge amount of pressure and knew that Hayden was coming. I blurted out, "He's coming!" and though I wasn't looking and had no idea what anyone was doing at this point behind me, there was a panic.  Daniel says that a nurse stuck her hand behind me at that point, and said, "Yes, the baby's coming!" and then everyone began to run.  I was assisted up onto the bed for fear that the baby was going to fall to the floor.  I wasn't trying to push but totally felt my body pushing him out on it's own as I was there on all 4's on the bed.  I was told that there was a flood of nurses at this point in the room trying to get the delivery table set up and everything prepared because he was coming so fast.  My midwife told me that she nearly took out 2 people running down the hallway.  All I heard was a voice say, "reach down and touch your baby" and a few moments later, "he's here, you can hold your baby!"  I think I may have only physically put in 2 pushes because my body was doing much of the work.  I rolled over onto my back and they placed Hayden on my tummy-- his cord was too short to go any higher. 

I was in shock and in awe at what had just happened.  We had literally just pulled up at the doors of the hospital an hour ago.... we had only been in the actual delivery room like 20 minutes.  The pool only had a couple inches of water in it.  It was SO crazy.  I was on a high-- Hayden was finally here, and what an incredible story of his labor.  I DID IT!  I had my baby completely naturally! 

What an incredible, incredible experience!!

Hayden was here!  He picked his own birthday, there was no induction, no needles, not even a standard IV because there was no time.  I surprisingly felt really good.  No tearing, and really only just a little swelling which is to be expected.  

Hayden latched to the breast right away and breast feeding has been pretty awesome and easy in the few days since which is not something that could've been said of my 1st son.

In a lot of ways, I'm still on a high and an adrenaline rush.

It was simply awesome!

Hayden Daniel Kroh

2-19-12    12:50PM

7 pounds, 9 ounces

19 inches long

And a very special thank you to my village who made this possible! 

Leeland's Birth Story.

As the weeks continue to pass and we patiently wait for the time of Hayden's arrival into the world, I find myself reflecting on our sweet, handsome 1st born Leeland.  He will be 2 in April and I cannot believe how much he has grown over the past few months.  I am baffled each day by what he is doing and learning and saying.  Today I found myself clearing out my iPhone of photos, because it said that my memory was getting full and the other day refused to take a cute picture when I wanted it to-- many of the photos I found when I was going through the memories were of Leeland as a baby.  He was a baby at one point in time. And as I looked at those tiny little baby photos, wondering where the past 2 years went, I found myself thinking about his birth and what we have to look forward to with the birth of Hayden.  And then it dawned on me that I have never written out Leeland's birth story, so here it goes. 

Leeland's due date according to our doctor and the ultrasounds was April 11, 2010.  Honestly I was always weary of the date and never quite sure if it was right because my cycle had been so irregular.  They picked the date based off of his size in the first two ultrasounds that we had.  It was always very confusing to me though because at nearly every appointment in my last trimester, I was told that I was measuring too big.  In all actuality, the date is just a guess and technically he could come at anytime, but it was my first pregnancy and I was VERY attached to the date. 

I should also mention that I was very miserable the last few weeks, and I was SO SO SO anxious to meet my little boy.  In the last four weeks leading up to the due date, I was checked at each appointment to see if I was dilated or if there was softening of the cervix.  This is where things got to be VERY frustrating and VERY confusing.  When you go to a large OB practice, they rotate you through the various doctors because they want you to know each one, not knowing who will be on call for the delivery.  Each week I saw someone different, and each week I was told that I was progressing.  I went from 1cm, to 2cm, to even 3cm at one visit.  When they told me I was 3cm was when I had called in the last week and told them that I was feeling some unusual pain and had an increase in fluids and thought maybe I was leaking amniotic fluid.  They had me come in, checked me out and tested the fluid.  They said it was nothing and had me return home, but they must've felt sorry for me, or understood how ready I was to have the baby because they went ahead and set my induction for the following week.  The day before my due date, I went to the hospital and tried to be admitted-- I was having a few contractions here and there (nothing regular) and in my head, if I was at 3cm, then maybe, just maybe, they would decide to keep me.  I got in, undressed, was strapped to the monitors, and was checked..... I was then told I was only 1cm.  I tried to argue with the nurse at first explaining that just days before my OB told me I was a 3.  She played the "don't worry, he'll come when he's ready card."  I didn't like that, I was disappointed, I felt lame for embarrassing myself and coming in, I felt silly for getting my hopes up that they would keep me, I was ready to be done, I was uncomfortable, I wanted to meet my baby.... and I cried.... and I went home.

The next day was April 11th, a Sunday, we went to church.  We had been visiting some different churches at the time, trying to find our church home.  I remember being approached by several people in the congregation just introducing themselves and asking us how we heard about the church, what brought us there, etc.  I was pretty large at the time, so it would always come up, "when are you due" in which I would follow with, "today."  They always seemed so shocked, like I shouldn't be out of the house.  It was humorous, but what else did I have to do to pass the time?

As the few days before the induction came passed, I tried everything in my power to kick start labor.  I went on walks with our dog Lilly.  In fact, the Friday before his birth, I had walked 3 miles one afternoon at our local park. By myself, which probably wasn't too smart being so far along but in the end it did no good so it didn't matter.  I ate everything that the internet suggested, spicy food, eggplant, balsamic vinegar.  Nothing changed, and I didn't feel any different.  It was time to come to terms with the fact that I was being induced, and that I just needed to look forward to meeting our little guy in a few days.

The induction day came, we were to be admitted to the local Women's Hospital the evening of April 13th.  I think I was expecting to have him within a few hours that night, but that's not how it works.  We packed our bags, got checked into the hospital and settled into our labor and delivery room.  That night I was given Cervadil and was told that it would "kick start" labor, and also a sleeping pill to help me get some rest.  Not sure what I was expecting, but I didn't feel anything through the night.  The next morning the only change was that my cervix had softened some more-- apparently that's all that was supposed to happen with the Cervadil.  Around 8am I was hooked up to an IV of Pitocin and then sometime between 830 and 900, my doctor came in and broke my water with a large hook.  Immediately it was noted that my water was not clear, there was a large amount of meconium which essentially means that Leeland had pooped in the womb.  We had went over the dangers of meconium in our birthing class and I was a little worried by it, but my doctor and the nurse assured me that when it came time for delivery, Leeland would be suctioned and cleaned very thoroughly to ensure that he didn't inhale any of the meconium. 

As the day went on my family and Daniel's family were in and out of our room visiting and checking in.  My original goal was a "natural" childbirth.  In my head, I was still counting this as a natural childbirth because up to this point I hadn't had any pain medication.  In all actuality looking back, my natural childbirth was thrown out the window as soon as I accepted being induced. About 4 hours after my water broke, I began to get sick, as in throwing up.  We had been told in our birthing classes that this was fairly common, and I assumed I would be one of those lucky ones because I had been sick so much during the pregnancy.  Let me just say, that I can handle a lot of things.  I would consider myself at least somewhat tough, but when I get sick it is SO over.  I remember my morning sickness days early in pregnancy-- I'm talking about when I would curl up in the fetal position in the bathroom floor and cry for Daniel.  I'm a total sissy when it comes to sickness!  With all of that said, just because I was getting sick, didn't stop the contractions.  I had been able to stay on top of them and cope somewhat but suddenly, I found myself sitting up in the bed, hurling into a trash can and throwing in  the towel.  I remember saying the words, "I NEED and epidural."  Within 20 minutes the anesthesiologist was in to take care of it for me.  The rest of my labor, I layed in bed on Facebook  on my iPhone and watching TV.  The nurse came in every hour or so to check in on me and check my progress.  Just after 530pm it was time to push.

Pushing was a breeze.  I mean, I couldn't feel anything.  They had to tell me when to push because I had no idea when I was having a contraction.  The nurse was astonished by how well I was doing-- within 20 minutes, Leeland was almost out.  She had to halt me for us to wait on the doctor to come in.  The doctor arrived, I gave a few more steady pushes and out came Leeland around 610pm.

I'm not so happy that my original "natural childbirth" goal was thrown out the window and I'm really the only one to blame for it.  Sure I could point fingers at the doctors and their need to intervene and schedule things, but I was the one that didn't stand my ground.  I let a date get in the way, I was so focused on that date, and so focused on just getting it done.  As I look back, though I'm a little disappointed in myself, I know that it all worked out in the end.  In the end, I had a happy, healthy, handsome, 8 pound 6 ounce little boy in my arms.